Sunday, June 19, 2011

Lessons from Dad -- Learned, and Not Learned!

My dad was not my biological father.

As a matter of fact, I didn't meet my dad until I was 9 years old, although he knew me as an infant and was my godfather (another story, another time).  My parents divorced when I was small, and I only saw my real father occasionally. I was happy when my mom married this nice man who moved us from Oakland to Los Angeles, where he had a TV repair shop off LaBrea.

He was my dad from day one and never treated me as anything but his child. I appreciate everything he did for me...the time he invested in me, and the things he tried to teach me.  Some I listened to...some I didn't, but I can now admit...he was right about everything!  Read on....

10 Things Dad Taught Me (that I listened to)
  1. Always keep your car in working order.
  2. Take the time to set the table before you eat.
  3. 2 or 3 good friends are better than 20 phony ones.
  4. Never date a guy who won't meet your family.
  5. If you invite someone to your house, have food.
  6. Show up at family get-togethers, even if it's for a little while.
  7. Your mom may not always make sense to you, but respect her anyway--she's still your mom.
  8. Always have your OWN money.
  9. Let your children know they are loved.
  10. Marry a guy who respects and adores you.

10 Things Dad Taught Me (that I WISH I had listened to)

Dad circa 1968.
  1. You don't need more than 1 or 2 credit cards.
  2. A phone call should never take over 20 minutes.
  3. Always have carfare (or airfare) to get home.
  4. Don't change jobs just for more money.
  5. Check the expiration dates on your food items.
  6. You can't do everything at once, prioritize.
  7. You will wear yourself out if you burn the candle at both ends.
  8. Worry never solves anything.
  9. When you cook, fix enough for more than 1 day.
  10. Take the time to read directions.

Thanks Dad.  Miss you.

In Remembrance

To: Berman Frank,   
In remembrance of a father, it took a long time for me to know,
I wasn't there to be your daughter, You weren't there to watch me grow;

For all the years we spent apart, it sometimes made me sad,
That although you were my father, I could never call you Dad;

But, I rejoice today for the years we spent, catching up and moving on,
We accepted that so much had passed, and could not be undone;

And I've finally come to realize, although it's taken me awhile,
That you'll always be my father, and I'll always be your child;

Now it's time for me to say good-bye, and to mourn all that will not be;
And to say I'm so very grateful,
for your blood that runs through me.

(Linnie Frank Bailey, August 1995)